Senior Leaders Need Support Too!
Senior leaders are expected to solve problems, make employees happy, eliminate barriers, see into the future, adapt quickly, and more. They’re rarely approached with good news. Let’s be real: a big part of their role is handling problems.
And with all the eggs in their basket, there’s surprisingly little talk about providing support for them. With 60% of leaders reporting feeling “used up” by the end of each workday, something needs to give. Everyone talks about supporting employees, but leaders and executives get very little attention.
As senior leaders, we often think we shouldn’t ask for help and that we should instantly know the answers to everything. We rarely take time to truly support ourselves or even know what we need to support ourselves. In doing so, we start neglecting essential things like eating well, exercising, and sleeping.
Where and when did we collectively agree that being a leader means being a lone wolf who can’t ask for help? It’s completely false, and it only ends up hurting us in the end.
What Our Big Leader Brains Have to Say About It
Our refusal to ask for support straight up sabotages our success because when we start neglecting our needs, our biological and built-in brain impulses start kicking in because our Prefrontal cortex is a data organizing machine on steroids.
It quickly takes data, sorts it, and determines how to process it next. It’s wicked fast, consumes an enormous amount of energy, and wears out quickly.
Naturally, as senior leaders, our Prefrontal cortex can burn out fast, losing executive function and causing our brains to default to other regions of the brain that construct and regulate emotions.
When this happens, we’re:
- More emotional and less thoughtful
- Relying on habits instead of new ideas and solutions
Basically, our brains move us into survival mode, and autopilot takes over. And when we’re on autopilot, we revert to our internal patterns. Now, if we’re full of perfect habits and patterns, this might be fine, but that’s not usually the case. Because, well, we’re human.
As senior leaders, we’re taught that we need to figure things out. We’re rewarded for problem-solving, so in this moment of switching into autopilot, we’re unlikely to ask for the help that we need because so few of us have patterns that make it okay.
Beyond the reticence to ask for support, when we’re in survival mode, we’re less able to think creatively and deal with human controversies or dynamics. Which means we’re less likely to be able to do our jobs efficiently.
Our brains will always default to their core purpose — to keep us safe and alive. So if we’re not getting the support we need, the brain shuts down the things that consume too much energy and all ‘non-essential’ activity.
Guess what that includes? Problem-solving, creativity, innovation, emotional balance, and more.
3 Tips for Giving Ourselves More Support
So, how can we better support ourselves as senior leaders?
1. Start with the Basics
Everything starts with taking care of yourself. Stop neglecting the baseline stuff. Start eating well, exercising, and getting enough sleep.
If it’s hard for you to prioritize these things, start with smaller steps. Do five minutes of stretches in the morning. Have one less cup of coffee. Go to bed ten minutes earlier. Refuse the daily afternoon cookie. Start small, and build from there.
2. Ask!
As senior leaders, we often forget that it’s okay to ask for help. You don’t have to ask people at work, either. Instead, look at your personal community to find support. It can be as straightforward as asking someone, “Can you listen to me word vomit for five minutes? I’m trying to work through something.”
Beyond that, don’t be afraid to start delegating tasks. Anything you don’t have to do, give someone else the opportunity to step in and do it for you. This can help free up your time and allow you to take days off when you need to.
3. Incrementally Add Tools to your Toolbox
Start thinking about little things that can help make your life easier and make you feel supported. Too often, we decide to make changes and go all in. We’re like, “I’m going to read a business book a week, work out an hour a day, and try these three new productivity apps.” It’s too much all at once.
Conversely, we’re the worst about shooting our own ideas down before they’ve even had time to sit. Like, vacations for instance. How often have you wanted a vacation but immediately thought, “I don’t have the time!” Maybe you can’t take a vacation for a week, but what about taking a half-day to unplug?
Look for tools to add to your toolbox, a.k.a. things, behaviors, or resources that can make your life a little easier.
Ideas for these tools can come from anywhere. Be curious and ask others what helps them. Try reading one journal article a month for new ideas. Not everything you come across will work for you, but try to find at least one new tool to add to your toolbox to make your daily life and work-life a little easier.
To Support Others, You Must Support Yourself
As senior leaders, we need to start prioritizing our needs. Even though we may feel like we’re invincible, we’re prone to burn out just like everyone else. No matter how amazing you are, you can’t override your brain’s natural process to survive.
Start taking care of yourself and asking for help when you need it. Always be open to new ideas to help make you feel more supported, happy, and whole.
If you’re a female senior leader who needs a little help prioritizing yourself, check out Destination Element Mexico, an 8-day program in a beautiful Mexican mountain location designed specifically for women leaders.
Or, if you’re looking for more general support, email us today at hello@thedisruptiveelement.com.
